Child Protection Network hosts Blue Kids event

Child Protection Network Blu Kids Tree

The Blue Kids event is coming Feb. 18th to the Marriott Hotel in Uptown Normal. (photo courtesy CPN.)

Judy Brucker, director at the Child Protection Network, invites the community to the Blue Kids event at the Marriott Hotel in Uptown Normal on Feb.18.

Tickets can be purchased for $65 each by calling 309-888-5656. Brucker announced that they will auction everything from dinner parties to a trip to Ireland at the event.

Brucker also addressed recent statistics regarding the volunteer hours contributed through the CASA program in McLean and Livingston counties. She stated 75 CASAs advocated for 147 kids and donated 7,633 hours of their personal time.

In addition, Brucker promised to share a recent article published in the CPN newsletter regarding the reasons kids will often not tell of abuse that is occurring. The article written by Sharon Klingman is below.

You can hear the interview with Brucker below:

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Patti Penn can be reached at patti@wjbc.com.

Why Don’t Kids Tell?  ….. immediately? …or soon after the abuse?…or ever?

By Sharon Klingman, MS, CADC, LCPC, Crisis Interventionist

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, obviously this child is lying because if this abuse had really happened, she would have told someone at the time and not waited until two years later!” How many times have we heard this happen in court? How many times has a perpetrator walked free because the jury had doubts for this very reason? The answer is, unfortunately, too many times! The fact is that more often than not, kids DON’T tell right away! In fact, in my experience, the closer the victim is to the abuser the less likely they are to come forward immediately.

Think about it! You’re a child who has been told about “stranger danger” and told that you should tell Mom and Dad RIGHT AWAY if something ever happens to you. Well, if your abuser is a stranger, or a neighbor, or a teacher, or no one really important in your world then yes, you might tell right away because you have reason to trust that Mom and Dad want to know about this and will take care of you.  But what if the abuser IS Dad, or step-dad, or Grandma, or a sibling? What if you know that telling will change everything? What then? Many kids take the “wait and see” approach. In their minds, they try to imagine what will happen if and when they do tell? Will Dad go to jail? Will Mom believe me? Will my brother have to move away? Will they all blame me? They turn it round and round in their minds, trying to make the right choice as the weeks, months and even years go by.

The possible outcomes are beyond scary. And while that child is trying to decide what to do, the abuser may repeat the offense once, more than once, again and again, now making it even more difficult to tell. “If I tell now they’ll all wonder why I didn’t tell last time?”. Or what if the abuser threatens the child or their family? Children don’t think like adults – they are concrete thinkers and cannot see the irrational part of that threat.  What if Dad is usually such a great father, going fishing together, coaching the team, teaching bible study, but there’s just that ONE thing that I don’t like? Is it worth losing all of that?

Even young children feel that bad things that happen to them are their fault. They cannot take into consideration their own ages and abilities. This doesn’t become apparent to them until they are older and their brains have developed further. Even then, many will still assume the blame. There are many more reasons why kids don’t tell and the bottom line is that there are so many powerful reasons NOT to tell, it makes one wonder why kids ever do tell, at all. As an advocate for children take the time to correct a false belief about the timing of disclosure of abuse if you happen to hear someone expressing the above sentiment. After all, they might be on that jury someday one day!

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