By David Stanczak
Alphonse and Gaston are two mythical Frenchmen whose politeness gets in the way of everything. They are the guys who get blamed when a fly ball lands in the midst of several fielders, who are imagined to be having a conversation: “After you Alphonse,” “No, no, Gaston, I insist.” Plop.
Alphonse and Gaston make their appearance in Bloomington-Normal periodically on political matters, more specifically unpopular political matters. One city council would like to do something which it has reason to believe will probably be unpopular, like increasing a sales tax. But it doesn’t want to be all alone in doing it. Enter Alphonse and Gaston. Last week, the Normal Town Council approved an increase in its sales tax, largely to fund a new soccer complex, but made the increase contingent on Bloomington doing the same thing. A smart piece of business. Normal says it’s on board but ONLY if Bloomington is. If Bloomington signs on, the deal is done and neither council stands out as being the spendthrifts. If Bloomington doesn’t follow suit, Normal hasn’t raised taxes, but all the wailing and gnashing of teeth among soccer enthusiasts will be done at Bloomington City Hall, the headquarters for those cheapskates who don’t care about kids’ well-being and development.
NEWS FLASH TO NORMAL TOWN COUNCIL! The two municipalities, although they share much in common, are not identical. Bloomington is talking with a Budget Task Force created to give it ideas on how to make financial ends meet. It has some major pension payment problems that are not going to go away. And, unlike some municipalities which shall remain nameless, Bloomington hasn’t had occasion to bring the Wallendas to town to open a new hotel. The Bloomington City Council was elected by its citizens to solve its problems, which right now are way bigger than a soccer complex. I don’t know if the Council is going to raise the sales tax, but if it does, it had better be for something that is going to help it out of its financial mess. They’ll get a red card from me if they do it for soccer.
